John Audet

Self-Image Are you letting it hold you back?

Self-Image.

Are you letting it hold you back?

So many of us have a poor self-image and it is incredibly restricting. We don’t feel effective in an adult world. We are scared and harbour fears that we very often hide deep within our subconscious. This state of trepidation has come about from the experiences gained in our early development. It undermines our confidence and acts as a barrier to self-belief. The more suppressed these fears are the more we seem to deem them to be natural tendencies and take the easy way out with such excuses like “well it’s just not me” thus, the less we are able to function effectively in achieving our dreams. If we do not understand the destructiveness of low self-esteem and its damaging effects, our ability to grow as a person becomes severely restricted and in times of trouble we do not have the strength to carry on. It prevents us from ever reaching our potential as an adult. Our concepts remain small, safe and childlike. We are not convinced of our strength, power or abilities. The result, we don’t feel effective in an adult world. The pressures of childhood haunt us. If we are not the success we want to be, we are not yet functioning at our maximum potential.

Why is early conditioning so effective in shaping today’s image? Because we bury our childhood fears and inhibitions in our subconsciousness and don’t really believe we can live in a grown-up world. We feel like pretenders. The subconscious, powerful as it is, does not have a sense of judgement and will disregard any logic. All those childish fears that we continue to hold on to are unchallenged by reality.

This conditioning needs to be changed if the fear of success is to be supplanted by the adult concept that success is not beyond us but an acceptable part of our being. If we see ourselves as more adequate then we will become more adequate.

So what are the characteristics in our nature that are likely to hinder our progress to getting what we want in life?

These are some of the possibilities you may wish to explore.

Do I try to see what others think before I take a stand?

Would I rather have people dislike me rather than look down on me?

Can I admit I am fair in my dealings with others?

How do I rate my leadership qualities?

Do I explore subjects that I know nothing about and so expand my general knowledge or do I just stick to what I know?

When faced with a problem, do I act on impulse to solve it?

Am I an analytical person?

How would I analyse my intellectual efficiency?

Do I always try to do a little better than is expected of me?

Do I like it when I receive public acclaim from my peers?

Do I believe that in many ways the poor man is better off than the rich man?

Do I believe that planning my activities in advance is likely to take the fun out of them?

How do I analyse my ambitions in life?

Do I believe that when prices are high I cannot blame someone for getting everything he can whilst the going is good?

Do I feel that we ought to take care of ourselves and let others take care of themselves?

Do I feel any guilt or shame if I am content to drift along whilst others take on the responsibilities of running things?

How do I rate myself as a responsible person?

Do I think that there are as many opportunities for an ambitious person as there ever were?

Do I often have doubts as to what actions will win approval for me?

Do I ever doubt that I will make a real contribution to the world?

Do I get upset when I feel I have been placed in competition with another?

Hopefully this will help you sort out some of the hidden obstacles that are hindering your success. Your frame of mind can easily be infected by doubt created by the negative comments of others. Give yourself every chance of success by not giving in to their rebuffs and avail yourself of the opportunity to have a successful life.

John Audet